The Art of Scarring

by squint

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about

Recorded and Engineered by Matt Fredrickson at Jacketweather Studios, Austin, TX
Mixed by Joseph Milligan at Suedehead, Austin, TX
Mastered by Paul Leavitt at Valencia Recording, Baltimore, MD

squint is: Dane Adrian, Matt Fredrickson, Matthew Coleman, Nathan Snyder, Ray Murley

Executive Producer: Erin Riley

Album Art: Jeremy Parker at PunkRockLoveArt and Matthew Coleman

credits

released 19 September 2014

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all rights reserved

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Track Name: Hello Brooklyn
You can save your sorrys for yourself.

All these murals and photographs
are wicked paper memories
of a time, when I stood
so proud of all our children
with a blink, and a wave.
I'm across from you at a wake
I am scarred, but I am strong
Together we are not afraid

I don't know you.
And you don't know me.
So why should I care about your silly “plans”

Hello Brooklyn.
How have you been?
Why haven't you called?
You can save your sorrys for yourself
I might kiss your lips if they'd stop moving

With my hands, in my chest
a tourniquet on a broken heart
I will be, your hero
I will be, your God damn excuse
So take up your arms
And run to the east
You can burn
Everything
In my name
and every little thing will be alright

I don't know you.
And you don't know me.
So why should I care about your silly “plans”

Hello Brooklyn.
How have you been?
Why haven't you called?

You can save your sorrys for yourself
I kiss your lips, and they stop moving

Hello Brooklyn.
How have you been?
Why haven't you called?
Hello Brooklyn.
Track Name: The Spontaneous
Hey, beautiful.
I know it’s not your graduation day.
But they don’t make a card for this moment
But hey, maybe this one will ease your pain.
My words
And my thoughts
While I scream from my heart
to my throat
from my mouth
through the air
Into your ears, but you don’t care
Let it be known, let it be known.
That I am in pain
Hey, hey beautiful.
I’m not convinced that you know this
I have no regrets
But would you do it all again?
In the back of the synagogue
getting drunk off communion wine
Patiently I waited
Went through the contents of my pockets
While my angel screamed and cursed out “God”
And the trees stood still as if in awe
White knuckles grasp the railing
Sweat beads and pulse is racing
There is no sound, where’s the sound?
Where’s the damn sound?
Not a single breath escaping
on my knees praying, shaking
There is no sound, where’s the sound?
Where’s the damn sound?
My words
And my thoughts
While I scream from my heart
to my throat
from my mouth
through the air
Into your ears, but you don’t care
Into your ears, but you don’t hear
Let it be known, let it be known.
I am in pain
Track Name: Die Guilty
So...you prayed about this did you?
Knees bent and clutching hands?
Ten years of Sunday school
flowing up to the Promised Land

How long?

How exactly did He put it?
What were God’s exact words?
How did God tell you was the best way to lie to me?

Die guilty
So...you think that this is over?
Well it's not.
Die guilty

You call me a sinner?
We both know I’m not a saint.
But don’t you think you are better.
I know for a fact, you ain’t.

So...you think that this is over?
Well it's not.
Die guilty
Die guilty
Track Name: Grand Theft
Hey, hey, hey
Popping hoods and so hot wired
gasoline tank full perspired

All night long
She kept me up all night long
New Orleans
She was my favorite little hotel queen

Hey, hey, hey…
I drove her like I stole her
Well, hell…I guess I did.

I'm a lock pick gun and slim Jim
She got those leather, thighs, and chrome trim

Hey, hey, hey, well, I guess I did.

Sorry Charlie, she’s with me tonight
Tomorrow, I won’t care
Track Name: Saves Nine
Did you believe me when I told you
That I had nothing but the best intentions
And would you believe me if I told you
That I am not ashamed
To admit that I’m afraid
To admit that I’m not okay
To admit that I’m afraid
Of what may...

Well you are....
And you’re so....
And I can’t....
The words, they escape me
If I could capture all the time I wasted chasing you
I wouldn’t. Would you?
And if I could go back and I could do it all again
I wouldn’t. Would you?

I slurred and I stumbled through countless arguments
My head in my hands, I played it over and over again in my head
I’ve been here so many times, and I know where it ends

Well you are....
And you’re so....
And I can’t....
The words, they escape me
If I could capture all the time I wasted chasing you
I wouldn’t. Would you?
And if I could go back and I could do it all again
I wouldn’t. Would you?
Track Name: Local Celebrity
The man at the bar is a friend of his
But he don’t even know his name
He calls him out by the drink of his choice
This is the local price of fame
He never wanted to be here
He never thought that it would last this long
Never thought he’d be pouring drinks
With a college degree and head full of dreams

The girl at the end of the bar has declined the drink that you bought for her
Says she’s sorry, but she’s had too much
She wouldn’t mind one of your cigarettes
She don’t smoke, but only when she’s drinking
Isn’t that what everyone says?

Same time, same place, the same damn show
He’s your local celebrity

Dim lights and the neon signs
Beckoning to the passerby
Come on in, and sit on down
Make your friends by buying a round
How are you doing, and what can I get you?
His one-liner, his catch-phrase

Same time, same place, the same damn show
He’s your local celebrity

The matchmaker
The cab caller
The moral authority
With wet shoes
A stained shirt
The uniform of the hometown hero

Same time, same place, the same damn show
He’s your hometown hero
Same time, same place, the same damn show
He’s your local celebrity
Same time, same place, pouring his way into the local hall-of-fame
Track Name: Skirmishes
Like alcohol and cigarettes
Nothing good ever comes of it
There is nothing I hate more than a lie

I don't know how you do it
But you always do it
It doesn't matter
You’re all shout, no fight

If seconds feel like hours
Then hours feel like years
and every single minute is more than two days
and too long to wait for you to die
Calendars and watches lie
They can burn my flag, but I hold my head up high

I don't know how you do it
But you always do it
It doesn't matter
You’re all shout, no fight

Rise up, rise up
Everyone will know my name

They cut and burn and seer my skin
With needles, pills and carcinogens
Burnt out
But it will never fade
Fall down
Drag it up, drag it up, drag it up, drag it up
Like alcohol and cigarettes
nothing good ever comes of it
There is nothing I hate more than a lie

I don't know how you do it
But you always do it
It doesn't matter
You’re all shout, no fight

Rise up, rise up
Everyone will know my name

They can burn our flag; we hold our heads up high.
Track Name: If You Ever
Why do I have to pray
About something I already know the answer to?
I’m right. You’re wrong.
And God’s not going tell me otherwise.
One last thing, one last thing
Cause I was hoping
If you ever loved me
If you ever cared, then…

Tell me you hate me
Tell me we're through
Tell me you used me, tell me the “truth”
Tell me to give up
Tell me to move on
Tell me we will never be together again
Tell me I'm stupid
Tell me I'm dumb
Tell me I wasn't the only one
Tell me we're over
Tell me you cheated
Tell me you lied when you told me forever

Lie to me
Lie to me
Break my heart – make me believe

Never again, never again
Will I lie or curse or even sin
If you could find it in your heart
To make her disappear
So you don’t believe I pray?
Well there’s a little taste.
One last time, one last time
cutting and slashing so if you ever cared…
Track Name: Above the Bridge
This is not a lecture.
It’s not a lesson or a speech
It just a list of things I’ve learned
on the path to goals I will never ever reach
This is not statement.
A declaration of the truth
Just an account of things
that happened on my way to Duluth

Minnesota is coming fast
My frozen heart is in my past
I don’t know why I’m leaving this place
My baby, the Upper Peninsula

This is not a regret.
About the choices I have made
I fought so many demons
In the form of asphalt, snow, and rain
This is not a knee-jerk
A backlash against the truth
Just an account of things
that I saw on my way to the boot

Louisiana is coming fast
My frozen heart, is in my past
I don’t know why I’m leaving this place
My baby, the Upper Peninsula

A little Yankee-doodle lagniappe
For all you kids in the swamps
Although I love it, I miss it
It’s a part of me, I miss you – The U.P.

Say ya! Ya!
To da U.P. eh? Eh?

Although I love it, I miss it
It’s a part of me, I miss you – The U.P.
Track Name: Giving Up the Ghost
She was not above faking
She was not above leading on
It was not above bleeding, not above choking - not above death.

Carefully proceed my friend
Your next words could be ringing in your ears for years
Carefully proceed my friend
I can only break so much
So much before I’m broke

I am not above begging
I am not above change
but I can overcome her
I can over love her
I can over take her
I can over

Carefully proceed my friend
Your next words could be ringing in your ears for years
Carefully proceed my friend
I can only break so much
So much before I’m broke

You falter
You stumble
You’re always
Giving up the ghost
It crumbles
It buckles
You're always
Giving up the ghost
This world is cruel and unkind
I'm the one calling the shots this time
I won't fail
I won't choke
I won't be
Giving up the ghost

It was not about science
It was not about pain
It was about mercy
About safety
About a cancer

Carefully proceed my friend
Your next words could be ringing in your ears for years
Carefully proceed my friend
I can only break so much
So much before I’m broke

You falter
You stumble
You’re always
Giving up the ghost
It crumbles
It buckles
You're always
Giving up the ghost
This world is cruel and unkind
I'm the one calling the shots this time
I won't fail
I won't choke
I won't be
Giving up the ghost
Track Name: Welcome
So where are you going to sleep tonight?
Whose floor is it going to be this time?
Do you suppose a call is too much to ask
For a little peace of mind?
So what’s it going to be this time?
The bridge, a train, traffic, or overtime?
I know you got one, so let’s hear it.
I know you can’t wait to tell me why you couldn’t make it.
At home, in bed, staring at the ceiling,
I’m wondering when you’re coming home.
It’s way too late, I’m giving up on you again
My eyes are closed, but my ears tuned to the phone.
So what’s it going to be this time?
The bridge, a train, traffic, or overtime?
I know you got one, so let’s hear it.
I know you can’t wait to tell me why you couldn’t make it.
Let me guess. It’s going to be another hour?
Let me guess. Something ‘just came up’?
I know you got one, so let’s hear it.
I know you can’t wait to tell me way you couldn’t make it
…to tell me why you couldn’t make it.
So what’s it going to be this time?
The bridge, a train, traffic or overtime?
I know you got one, so let’s hear it.
I know you can’t wait to tell me why you couldn’t make it.
So where are you going to sleep tonight?
Whose floor is it going to be this time?
How hard it is to sleep alone at night
Not knowing if everything’s alright.
Track Name: Sunday Morning in the Afternoon
Rubbernecking
Another Friday night
As I gaze upon the wreckage
That was your life last night
I'm not going to apologize
For never offering you a ride
We all make our own decisions
...and all of yours were terrible

Flowers stuck in Styrofoam
A cross on the side of the road
It's Sunday morning in the afternoon

I stand and deliver
These words that will move you
I’ll make them believe that
I am fighting back tears

The make and model of your car
Crackles and struggles from the speakers of my AM radio
It’s not as if this comes as some surprise
We all offer our abilities to fake apologize
Falling all over your family
It’s the social event of the brand new year

It’s Sunday morning in the afternoon

I stand and deliver
These words that will move you
I’ll make them believe that
I am fighting back tears

And all of you who drove on by
You place the blame on me
Bitching about an inconvenience
As you pass a tragedy

All my life
I've been so careful
No broken bones
No risks no gains

But I can't say
I've done mine better
cause in your days
you were so free.